Shiny Happy People Discussion Questions + 5 Lessons

Shiny Happy People Discussion Questions written by the Elf and the Ent. This post contains affiliate links, you can find out more on our policies page or in the disclaimer at the bottom of the blog.

Know Before You Watch

Show Name: Shiny, Happy People
Rating: TV-16
Age Suggestion: 16 and up
Episode Length: Four episodes with an average run time of 45 minutes
Release Date: June 1st, 2023
Where to Stream: Amazon Prime
Warnings: There is a lot of discussion of sexual assault, Child molestation and pornography are also mentioned, In general there is a lot of discussion of religious trauma and the direct effect of that in people’s lives.

Shiny Happy People Summary

Shiny Happy People: Duggar Family Secrets follows the Duggar family as well as the culture that brought them to where they ended up. But this documentary is about far more than just one family. It’s a prime example of the problem of western evangelical theology and religious power. And how the fear based roots have poisoned so much of modern culture and religion. If you are not familiar with them, the Duggar family was famous for their hit reality show, 19 kids and counting. The show lasted 7 seasons. By the end of the show, the family was flooded with controversy.

The first episode dives into the history of the Duggar family. We get the origins of the show and what led Jim Bob (father) and Michelle (mother) to agree to the show. By the end of the episode, it is revealed that there is a dark underbelly to the calm family exterior. Resulting in things like Josh Duggar being involved in child pornography and abusing family members.

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The next two episodes really dive into the ministry and culture that breed this kind of abusive environment naturally. This starts with Bill Gothard’s organization IBLP (Institute in Basic Life Principles). It dives into the fear based patriarchal belief systems that the Duggars centered their family values around, thinking that it was Biblical. To so many, it seemed like the godly solution to uncertainty and fear. Plus an easy and pleasant family life.

The last episode focusses on the fallout of authoritarian theological teaching. More specifically Gothard’s ministry (which is still up and running). The thing that struck us the most about the series though, is how much of a current problem it is. Here are some lessons we got from the documentary and Shiny Happy People discussion questions.

5 Lessons from Shiny Happy People

1) A lot of our Western Theology is Rooted in Fear

This series focuses on IBLP, but this issue is much further reaching in Western Theology. Gothard was able to influence a large portion of a generation by fear-mongering. Tapping into both personal and cultural insecurities to perpetuate white, patriarchal, and political religious power. It molds privilege and power into ordained gifts and makes control seem biblical. This article from a couple who was fired from a Christian university for not allowing the preschool to spank their child is an example of how pervasive this problem is.

2) It’s Not Some Far Off Cult- It’s Everywhere

The ever-reaching effects of this movement from sixty years ago (and well before that) is so prevalent and quite frankly, a bit scary. The most obvious of these effects is in politics, but it goes so much deeper from the structure of families to abuse. We have created generations of abusers in this western evangelical movement and are still being persuaded by the fear. The Duggars are not the Kardashians. These are the stories of people down the street from you. They may not have 20 children, but they’ve been deeply influenced by the theology of needing power and control over your children, over questions, and love or justice.

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3) Abusers Are Protected and Victims Are Blamed

This is an unfortunate fact known by too many people, but it is so well highlighted within this series. Specifically, we see how Jill Duggar and IBLP surviviors were forced to take on the weight of the perpetrator rather than the victim. And unfortunately it’s not uncommon at all. Especially within the church. There is a fear about child abusers that is just not accurate. That they are godless, horrible, evil individuals that you would instantly recognize. But many churches support the victimizers more than the victims. Because they aren’t odious oozing monsters. I recently wrote an article on 5 new things I’m teaching my children about predators, read it here. Often victims experience more harm than help from church, and that is insidious.

4) The Familiar Fear That’s Still Being Manipulated: You’re Raising Your Kids Wrong

There is so much judgment about parenting, especially with mothers. This judgment leaves many prime targets for salesmen to come and give simple solutions, like Bill Gothard’s “ministry”. These solutions not only make things worse in the short term, but have damaging effects in the long term. I enjoyed reading this take on the documentary about Christian fatherhood not needing to be control based- read it here. We’ve experienced this child focused evangelical control in our foster care journey. Children are useful as long as they can be used for church growth or political gains. And unfortunately we have personally seen very, very little effort to support the kids and families that need the most community.

5) Questions Are a Good Thing

If you were raised in any sort of Western Evangelical culture, there is a good chance that you have had an experience in which you were made to feel as if questioning was dangerous or a sign of lack of faith. In this series you see why this is such a hallmark of patriarchal social structures, it’s an easy control method. But the God I believe in is big enough to handle questioning. If you are not questioning, you are not growing. What is currently seen in Western Evangelical culture as dangerous deconstruction is a normal and healthy part of Christianity in other sects of the religion and in other parts of the world.

Continue reading for our Shiny Happy People Discussion Questions and Quotes

Shiny Happy People Quotes

“In this community, the word ‘abuse’ doesn’t really exist”

“There have been so many people who have been hurt by this so called ministry”

“The Duggar family is not a bizarre fascination. It is a horrifying glimpse of a story that was told over, and over, and over again”

“We had people right in front of us that needed the biggest help and all we ever did was throw prayer at them.”

“In the culture that Gothard created, there is an unchecked power dynamic at play, and whenever that happens, you’re going to start seeing some form of abuse”

-Shiny Happy People Quotes

Shiny Happy People Discussion Questions

1. Were you raised in a religious environment? If so, how much of this patriarchal white supremacism impacted your theology growing up? (EG: The gender umbrella of authority, blanket training, religious supremacy)
2. How do people become victims of this rotten theology?
3. Are the principals that were most influential (and are currently) to these political and financial influencers Biblical or just logical?
4. What signs should you look for, or what might be a red flag, for anything that’s influencing your way of thinking? (Eg: When you fear yourself, when God’s love is circumstantial, offering quick solutions, taps into fear, etc…)
5. How has this way of thinking crippled generations?
6. Does God show favoritism? Where does the idea of getting extra jewels in your crown come from?
7. How can you use your voice to push against this way of thinking?
8. Growing up, I idolized the Duggar family and was mesmerized by the calm kids. Now I feel sorry for kids who were silenced. What did you know about these reality TV families and has this changed your perspective?
9. Were you aware that parents who are accused of abuse and exploitation are still entitled to visits, many unproperly supervised, with their children? (Such as Josh visiting with his children with his parents as the legal supervisors). Were you aware of how hard it is to prove abuse in court?
10. What was your biggest take away from this documentary? What is an actionable step you can take now that you know this information?

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